A Message

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Sean, 1978-

“You just gave those people a death sentence, and everyone is la-di-da about it; whatever, it’s not me. But you know what? You’re next. You’re next for something.”

Get these old people off the streets, get the handicaps off the streets. There’s no excuse, it’s a shame that we keep forgetting our history. All these people here, who have mental problems, talk to themselves because no one wanted to talk to them, so they started to talk to themselves. It is a form of isolationism. They isolated themselves: sometimes it is curable, sometimes it is not. We need to find ways for them.

Reagan closed half the psych wards, you remember? To save money. We are still feeling it, and those people are still walking around, and the ones not walking around are dead. You just gave those people a death sentence, and everyone is la-di-da about it; whatever, it’s not me. But you know what? You’re next. You’re next for something. You are, and that’s not a fear tactic. You stand up. You stand up, and stop being scared! It sickens me, it sickens me to be around it. I don’t want to be in a barbaric society anymore. Stop acting like that, stop this ‘me versus you versus us, versus him, versus them’. Man, it’s nuts! It drives me crazy to see people acting like that. I want to take them and shake them, ‘What the fuck are you doing? Why are you like this?’ Your parents couldn’t have been that bad. Doing it to a 60 years old person? Just stop it!


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Thieves

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Sean, 1978-

“‘My son stole this candy bar, I want to pay for it, and he is going to apologize to you right now. Go ahead!’”

You see, I hate thieves, I have total disdain for them. I was about six years old, and it was winter in upstate NY. I was my mom’s favorite to go grocery shopping with. We went down to a store called Food Circus, and were shopping around. My mom has a rule, ‘Don’t ask for anything until I’m done shopping, just help me out.’ Well, I was looking around and didn’t have money for anything, so I stole a candy bar, put it in my pocket.

A few hours later, we were back home, my mom comes to me, ‘Sean, what’s this?!’ ‘Ah. . . it’s a candy bar wrapper,’ I tell her, ‘You bought it for me.’ {He laughs.} ‘No, I didn’t buy this, I don’t buy you candy bars! Put your clothes back on, we’re going back to Food Circus!’ I got my clothes on, straight back to Food Circus. My mom the manager of the store, she goes up to him and says, ‘My son stole this candy bar, I want to pay for it, and he is going to apologize to you right now. Go ahead!’ The manager looks at me and says, ‘Why? Why did you steal from me? I have a family, too. Your mom is an excellent woman, you can’t grow up to be like that.’

Man, I started crying so bad, I didn’t even remember the ass-whipping I got, that was the worst part of it. So, I don’t steal, fuck that. I don’t like it because it is taking from someone else. On every turn, people go into stores, Walmart, Walgreens or somewhere else, they steal and think, ‘we’re stealing from a corporation.’ No you are not, you are stealing from the people who work for it. The cooperate gets their money back, but they fire people to make even more money. So, why? Do you really need things that badly?! I mean food is one thing, but things, objects? Whatever, man! Did you know that the average American has 400,000 different things inside their house?!


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My Cousin Kevin

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Sean, 1978-

“I am a porch kid. There are corner kids and porch kids. For instance, you are a porch kid. Porch kids stay on the porch, and they go in when the street lights come on. A corner kids hangs out in the corner.”

Important someone in my life? Pretty much everyone. I’m detached, detached from everyone. I haven’t seen my relatives in 12 years. But growing up, it was my cousin Kevin. I didn’t have a father after five years old. Once I turned 13, I met my cousin, and once I turned 15 or 16, I stopped hanging out with other fellas, they were getting into too much trouble. I am a porch kid. There are corner kids and porch kids. For instance, you are a porch kid. Porch kids stay on the porch, and they go in when the street lights come on. A corner kids hangs out in the corner.

Well, my cousin Kevin, he gave me a good refuge. When I would get into arguments with my mom, I would go to my cousin Kevin. He liked video games, and is a professional boxer, won a couple of titles. Later on in my life, he taught me how to box, and before, that he actually taught me how to be a man. I didn’t know going into it, I was taught how to be a man, by a man, my cousin.

Some of the best foods I ate wat at my cousin Kevin’s by his wife. And some of the best parties I went to. He loved taking me to little parties he had, that’s how I got to meet Mike Tyson, they knew each other. Tyson is cool, he’s a cancer, like me. Really cool, real touchy-feely, but used to have a bad drinking problem. Once he started drinking, they were, ‘Alright Mike, go home, you gonna cause a fight…. Go home!’ {he laughs} But yes, my cousin Kevin was an important figure in my life.



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