Sean, 1978-

“‘My son stole this candy bar, I want to pay for it, and he is going to apologize to you right now. Go ahead!’”

You see, I hate thieves, I have total disdain for them. I was about six years old, and it was winter in upstate NY. I was my mom’s favorite to go grocery shopping with. We went down to a store called Food Circus, and were shopping around. My mom has a rule, ‘Don’t ask for anything until I’m done shopping, just help me out.’ Well, I was looking around and didn’t have money for anything, so I stole a candy bar, put it in my pocket.

A few hours later, we were back home, my mom comes to me, ‘Sean, what’s this?!’ ‘Ah. . . it’s a candy bar wrapper,’ I tell her, ‘You bought it for me.’ {He laughs.} ‘No, I didn’t buy this, I don’t buy you candy bars! Put your clothes back on, we’re going back to Food Circus!’ I got my clothes on, straight back to Food Circus. My mom the manager of the store, she goes up to him and says, ‘My son stole this candy bar, I want to pay for it, and he is going to apologize to you right now. Go ahead!’ The manager looks at me and says, ‘Why? Why did you steal from me? I have a family, too. Your mom is an excellent woman, you can’t grow up to be like that.’

Man, I started crying so bad, I didn’t even remember the ass-whipping I got, that was the worst part of it. So, I don’t steal, fuck that. I don’t like it because it is taking from someone else. On every turn, people go into stores, Walmart, Walgreens or somewhere else, they steal and think, ‘we’re stealing from a corporation.’ No you are not, you are stealing from the people who work for it. The cooperate gets their money back, but they fire people to make even more money. So, why? Do you really need things that badly?! I mean food is one thing, but things, objects? Whatever, man! Did you know that the average American has 400,000 different things inside their house?!

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